Forgive Me
by sweetconformity
Summary: Blaine makes the biggest mistake of his life by starting an affair with his co-worker Sebastian Smythe, he finds out just how big when his husband's life ends up dangling on the brink of death.
1. Chapter 1

Blaine groaned as he plopped onto his back, tucking his right arm under his head before trying to control his breathing. Blaine stared briefly at the ceiling, his naked chest gleaming with sweat.

The sound of bed springs prompted Blaine to tilt his head towards the figure beside him. He felt the bed give a little as the man pushed off the mattress. He cocked an eyebrow before speaking, "Leaving already?"

"I've got to meet Wes downstairs in the lobby, we have to attend three blissful hours of topographic maps and bullet points. Aren't you supposed to attend?" the man replied while tugging his briefs on.

"I don't think so, must be strictly your department." Blaine shuffled his body upward to lay his back against the headboard.

"We can meet afterwards I guess. Maybe some coffee?" The man smirked brightly.

Blaine's face flashed with a bit of unease at the mention of coffee dates, "I don't think I can... I'm heading home in a few hours."

Through a stroke of pure coincidence Blaine's cellphone blasted with life, it's screen brightly displaying: _Kurt_.

Blaine nearly jumped with surprise at the interruption and quickly cradled the phone to his ear. Before answering, he gave his buddy a quick look of warning and put his finger to his lips, asking for silence.

"Hey, honey." Blaine shifted uncomfortably in his bed. "Oh, yes. Yeah, I was just about to head home. I'm going to check out in a few minutes."

The man shot a disapproving look to Blaine while fastening his tie and grabbing his suitcase beside the bed.

"Right. Okay. I know. I know." Blaine's tone became increasingly impatient. His face contorted in pain for a moment before he replied, "Love you too. Bye." He slapped his cellphone on his side table before running his hands through his short locks of dark hair.

"What's the bitch want now?" The man sighed to Blaine.

"Kurt. His name's Kurt." Blaine snapped, "I promised I'd take a trip back to Ohio with him tomorrow. I completely forgot."

"What? We're suppose to try that new Italian restaurant down the street from my apartment remember? Can't you cancel it or something?"

"Sebastian." Blaine let out an exasperated sigh, "You know I can't."

Sebastian rolled his eyes in annoyance, "Fine, when you're done with your bland husband, hit me up." he strolled out of the hotel room, shutting the exit firmly behind him.

Blaine ran his hand through his locks again, at this rate he was going to lose all his hair. He rolled off his bed then proceeded to collect his attire scattered across the hotel floor. Once his outfit was fully recovered, he headed to the shower. The presence of scalding water however, did little to wash away the tight knots in his back and the soap he scrubbed vigorously against his skin did little to wash away the feeling of dirtiness he felt seeping from his pores. Blaine grunted in resignation, before stepping outside of the shower onto the cold bathroom tiles. He wrapped a warm towel around his waist, staring at the foggy mirror before him. Bunching his hand into fist, he rubbed the mirror to make a complete circle. He stared at his reflection for a second, accessing any noticeable change in his features.

Blaine looked exactly the same, and for some reason this disturbed him. Shouldn't he look different? He felt different, he felt like he had changed. He rolled his neck for a second, trying to remove a kink. He glanced down at pristine bathroom counter and gripped the golden ring laying there. He slipped the ring onto his finger gently and gazed questioningly at it, as if expecting it to begin ridiculing him.

Blaine needed to stop this. He needed to stop now. He didn't want to become _that_ type of man, but somehow he had. Somewhere between his exhausting business schedule and adoring stay-at-home husband, he found time for an affair.

His betrayal hadn't originally started off as an affair, first it was just innocent... honest to god innocent lunch breaks with a co-worker. Somehow, on a rough day he had reached out for help in the worst possible place: Sebastian Smythe. Blaine letting off steam about a small bicker between him and Kurt lead to a steamy make-out session with Sebastian, and that steamy make-out session lead to sex, and that sex lead to a full blown affair.

It was about Blaine's work schedule, Blaine remembered. Kurt loved raising Lily their four-year-old daughter and thoroughly enjoyed pampering Blaine with classic homemade dishes, but he sorely missed Blaine's presence. Keeping Blaine's dinner warm eventually caught up to Kurt and he began to hint more and more about Blaine possibly taking a break to have "family time" as he had put it.

Blaine agreed initially, but something had come up. His boss had given him a big presentation, he knew he couldn't refuse. He was sure this would be the final factor to boost his career even further. Kurt couldn't understand and refused to, which lead to an ugly fight with unnecessary insults thrown from both sides. But this fight, Blaine knew deep down, could not even atone for a fraction of his sin.

As Blaine braved the path towards home, he decided this was it then, he'd stop. Blaine wouldn't mention a word of it to Kurt, he _could not._ He had no idea what Kurt's reaction would be, but he knew he couldn't fathom the idea of Kurt losing trust in him. It was Blaine's duty as Kurt's husband and Lily's father to keep the family safe, keeping this from them was for the better... at least that's what he told himself.

"Blaine!" Kurt rushed excitedly to his husband, embracing him in a tight hug.

"Hey, honey." he responded. His voice slightly muffled by his husband's shoulder.

Kurt smiled and stepped back, "I missed you."

Blaine shut the door behind him. "I missed you too." Blaine responded, before shifting awkwardly.

Kurt shot a confused glance at Blaine's stature before calling out to their daughter, "Lily! Your dad's home!" Kurt rushed towards the parlor, Blaine in tow.

Their daughter sat in the livingroom, sitting Indian style the dim light of their television. She turned her head, quietly accessing the men at the entrance of the parlor, before rushing forward to hug Blaine's leg. Lily was a quiet girl, she settled for tightly gripping her father's leg instead of screaming in delight.

Blaine smiled down at her before swooping her up into his arms, "Hey sweetie!" He nuzzled his nose to hers before admiring her cute dress, "Is daddy dressing you up again?" he turned to Kurt who blushed furiously, before walking out into the kitchen.

"Daddy and I played dress-up all day." Lily responded quietly.

"Oh? Did you have fun? Or did daddy?" Blaine held back a smile.

"I had tons of fun, but I missed you daddy." She squirmed a bit in her father's arms, "Where did you go?"

Blaine blinked a few times, collecting his thoughts quickly, "I had to work sweetie."

"You always have to work daddy." Lily frowned.

Blaine gave her a sympathetic smile, "Don't worry. We'll be going on a trip. For an _entire week_." Blaine emphasized the amount of time. It was the most he'd taken off in five years. "We're going to visit grandpa and grandma. How does that sound?"

Lily's face beamed with joy, "Really daddy!"

"Really. Now come on, I think daddy's waiting for us in the kitchen." Blaine gently placed Lily back on her feet before steering her into the kitchen.

"Mhmmm." Blaine hummed appreciatively at the aroma of his husband's meal.

"I made some chicken casserole tonight and chocolate dobash for dessert." Kurt happily served dinner to his small family then settled down to eat himself. He twirled his fork into his food and popped a portion into his mouth.

"It's delicious. Thank you Kurt." Blaine spoke with his cheek half full.

Lily followed suite, "It's del-deli-delicious daddy!" she adoringly struggled to pronounce delicious.

"Thank you, I got the recipe from Rachel... 'cept she uses some substitute meat for the chicken." Kurt turned his attention to Blaine across the table, "So, how has work been? Nice hotel?"

Blaine choked a bit on his casserole before taking a big gulp of water, "Same old. Average hotel room." he decided to stay blunt.

"They seem to be keeping you away a lot now, three years ago you didn't have to take any business trips at all." Kurt spoke conversationally.

"Yeah." Blaine replied lamely.

* * *

><p>"...and a left here." Kurt spoke, looking down at the map splayed across his lap.<p>

Blaine turned on the blinker, turning into a different road. "How much further?"

"Shouldn't be too long, we're entering Ohio soon. We'll probably get there before midnight."

Kurt craned his neck outside of the car window, the wind whipping through his hair. It was sunset and the sky was tinted in a beautiful orange, signaling the closing of day. The clouds were starting to roll in, creating an overcast.

Blaine couldn't help but to glance quickly in appreciation at his husband in that precise moment, Kurt smiling at the sky, his brown hair sloppily blowing over his face.

Kurt tucked his head back into the car before the first few droplets of rain hit the windshield, he rolled up the window before any water could enter.

"Looks like a storm is on it's way." Kurt sighed.

An hour later, Kurt was proven right. It was like someone was literally pouring buckets of water into their view and the ringing crack from the thunder every other minute kept Lily wide awake. The road was getting darker and darker as they progressed towards their destination.

"We should pull over. The map says there is a motel an hour down this road." Kurt sighed, eyeing the dreary weather outside. Lightening flashed in the distance. "We can just extend the trip another day, push the dates back."

Blaine squinted out the drivers window, taking deep caution driving down the windy roads near the forest. He nearly agreed with Kurt's suggestion, but remembered the business meeting around the exact day they initially planned to return. "We can't. Business meeting." he spoke.

"Well, tell your boss there's a storm. I'm sure he'll understand." Kurt reasoned.

"I can't." Blaine tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

"Look, it's past eleven. Lily can't go to sleep and these roads are dangerous even _without _the rain. Just pull over at the motel."

"We don't need to. We'll make it there in three hours and Lily will eventually fall asleep. Right sweetie?" Blaine glanced to their daughter in the back seat.

Kurt paused, flabbergasted for a minute. No. He was tired of letting this go, tired of business coming before family. Not this time. "No." Kurt spat stubbornly, "We're pulling over Blaine. It won't kill you to miss a meeting if you call your boss up tomorrow. I'm sorry, but I'm really not comfortable driving in this storm."

"Driving? _You_ are not comfortable driving? _I'm_ driving!" Blaine seethed "I've been driving for four fucking hours! If I say we're getting there today, we're getting there today! I'm tired of you shoving my work aside like it's not important. Somebody has make the money in this family, it sure hasn't been you has it!" Blaine huffed.

Kurt winced, "You didn't. You promised you wouldn't. You told me when we decided to raise Lily, you wanted me to stay home. I told you if you wanted me to work, I would. Now you're attacking me about it?" he spoke softly.

"Don't push this on me! Of course I'm not going to ask you to start working again, you're always fucking guilt-tripping me about Lily needing lots of care. Lily can go to school now, she doesn't have to be homeschooled!" Blaine yelped completely forgetting about his frightened daughter in the back seat.

"I care about Lily, but since when did this argument become about Lily's education Blaine? I just want to pull over to stay at a motel." Kurt pointed out.

"Just shut up Kurt." It was out before Blaine could stop it. He froze for a second. Realizing what he'd just said he snapped his neck towards Kurt direction to apologize, "Kurt I didn't-"

Just enough time to miss a sharp turn in the road. A screech resounded in the black night, prompting Blaine to turn his head back to see an oncoming truck. He jerked the wheel to swerve away from the vehicle, sending the car into a spin.

Blaine's heart dropped when he saw he'd just turned into a ditch. The car thrusted foward down a small incline. Blaine didn't even have time to blink before he felt the impact and heard a small shriek. Blaine closed his eyes before the glass shattered onto his body and the belt around his torso stopped him from flying out the window with a bruising tug. Rain immediately began pouring in through the windows. Blaine took a shuttering breath and a moment of shock before snapping into action.

Blaine hastily unbuckled his seat belt, "Kurt!" Blaine snapped to his left, "Lily?"

"Daddy!" Lily sobbed from the back seat.

Blaine turned to see Lily, but stopped cold. Even with unrelenting rain, he could see clearly the passenger's side of the car took the brunt of the damage. A few small branches lay scattered on the hood of the car around a gigantic dent that hugged a tree. Kurt sat completely unmoving, head matted with blood leaning against the shattered glass of his window, the dashboard trapping the lower half of his body. Blaine let out a sob of fear for his husband before prying open his door, ignoring the remaining glass that dropped onto his arms.

"Lily, hold on." He swung the back door open, unbuckling and removing Lily from her seat. He gripped her tightly before stepping out into the rain "Are you hurt?" he demanded.

"No, but daddy..." Lily turned to see Kurt, but Blaine stepped in her view.

"Don't look, Lily. You stay still until I say you can move Lily. This is important. Don't look." Blaine led Lily to the back of the car, removing his jacket before wrapping it around Lily. "Use this to stop the rain."

Blaine practically sprinted to the passenger side of car, "Kurt!" he shouted over the rain pelting on the metal of their car. He gripped the door of the car and was surprised to find even in it's indecent shape it opened with ease. Blaine gripped Kurt's shoulder, making sure he didn't slump out of the car. The patch of skin under Blaine's palm felt completely cold, "Oh God, Kurt?" Blaine cried.

A light momentarily flashed in Blaine's eyes followed by a man's voice, "I'm calling 911!" he assumed it was the man who was driving the truck.

Blaine turned to see the driver steadily coming down the incline the car went down, cellphone in hand. He turned back to Kurt, feeling the pulse in his neck. Kurt's pulse was faint, barely sustaining life in his mangled body. "Kurt?" Blaine repeated.

"Is he dead?" the truck driver looked warily into the passenger's side of the car.

"I-I feel a pulse. J-Just tell them hurry." Blaine's voice broke.

While the man began giving directions to the ambulance, Blaine swiped a wad of hair stuck to Kurt's forehead with blood, "Sweetheart?" Blaine choked. He knelt next to the car and gripped Kurt's head firmly in his hand, "Not now Kurt." Blaine pleaded, "Please, not now. I can't. Please Kurt, don't leave me. Don't leave _us_!"

Kurt didn't respond.

"Daddy!" Blaine felt Lily tugging at his arm.

"I told you-" Blaine felt tears hot against his cheeks, "I told you to stay in back of the car Lily! You don't want to see this."

"They should be here in five minutes." the man peered over Blaine and his daughter.

By now everyone was soaked to the bone, including Kurt's limp body. Emergency forces arrived soon after, taking a significant amount of time attempting to bend the metal off of Kurt.

Blaine felt utterly helpless watching; he couldn't do anymore for Kurt. Once he and Lily got into the ambulance, he could only sit and watch as orders were being shouted across the van and view things he couldn't understand going on with tubes, needles, gauze bandages, machines... All that mattered was that this would help Kurt.

Blaine wanted to hold Kurt's hand, to hold his husband's hand, because he knew this could possibly be the last time he ever could, but even that was not permitted at the moment. Blaine sunk his face into the palms of his hands; his soul mate was on the brink of death.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: **Oh... my... God... Thank you so much to the 50 people who decided to follow my story and an extra thank you for those of you who took the time out to review. I know I didn't leave an author's note on the first chapter for this website, but I really do appreciate reviews and I do read all of them. I also must forewarn you that this is going to be a very short story, I'm talking one or two chapters left... Also I feel like crap because I'd already written more than half of this chapter before reading the GENIUS suggestions from my reviewers on both scarvesandcoffee and here. Don't worry though; I'm still considering a few. Uh, hope you enjoy now. ;)

* * *

><p>Blaine wrung his hands nervously, staring at his husband's motionless form. It had been like this the past couple of days, standing on Kurt's beside with nothing but the heart monitor there to assure him his husband was alive. Of course, Kurt's family had come to visit a few hours each day, but he was soon left alone to bare the brunt of his actions. Except, Blaine knew this day would be different. It wouldn't be like the first night he waited, when the doctors confirmed he could potentially lose his husband. He stayed awake that entire night, fitting every second he possibly could next to Kurt. For Christ's sake he was even fearful when he took a piss.<p>

Blaine's fears dropped a tiny notch when the doctors had finally decided to ease up on sedating Kurt, this meant it was highly likely he'd finally come to. Blaine remembered when the doctor told him that morning, his heart fluttered at the possibility of seeing his husband's eyes again and hearing his voice. He was disappointed to hear though, that him waking didn't necessarily mean they were in the clear. There could be a whole possible range of problems; especially considering the massive force Kurt had taken to the head.

Half into the day, while Blaine numbly flipped through some fashion magazine Carole left for Kurt,

he heard a gasp of breath from the hospital bed, rising to his feet, he found that his hand started trembling at the thought of finally talking to his husband again. He felt a pang in his chest, he didn't remember missing his husband this much when he was out with Sebastian.

"Kurt?" Blaine leaned over and clasped his husband's hand in his own. Bright blue eyes blinked back at him.

Kurt offered a soft smile; his breathing mask prevented him from talking immediately. He took in his surroundings for a brief moment, before shifting in bed. He didn't seem surprised at all, but very groggy.

"Kurt." Blaine reached his freehand over to stroke his husband's cheek, gazing adoringly, "Just hold on a second, let me get the doctor. I love you. Hold on."

Blaine reluctantly left, rushing out of the hospital room and returning back with the doctor. The doctor administered a few basic sensory tests and asked some questions before leaving the room. Blaine stood anxiously waiting for answers.

"He doesn't seem to be paralyzed or experiencing any memory lost, for that we can be grateful." the doctor nodded. "We'll still perform a CAT scan to make sure there isn't any brain damage and also check up on how his broken ribs are doing. I don't think it's a good idea to completely remove the respirator, but he can say a couple of words between the pumps."

As soon as tail of the doctor's coat hit the room's exit, Blaine scooted his chair near his husband's side and plopped down.

Kurt noticed his husband's urgency and couldn't help, but to feel giddy about his concern, Kurt stretched the elastic on his breathing mask to speak, "Hey." before snapping it back. Kurt's voice seemed strained, probably from the lack of water.

Blaine melted at the sound of Kurt's voice. He paused for a moment thinking about the last words he said to Kurt before now. He stared sympathetically at his husband before filling up a cup of water using the sink in the room. He tried to help Kurt take a quick sip, but Kurt waved him off, giving him a disapproving look. He wanted to drink it by himself.

Blaine settled back in his seat before grabbing Kurt's hand. "I'm sorry Kurt. I'm so sorry. I should have just listened to you, you wouldn't be here if I'd listened." he tightened his grip on Kurt's hand, looking apologetic.

Kurt set down his cup of water and moved his mask before gently scolding, "Don't blame yourself. I don't blame you." He grazed his thumb over Blaine's knuckles.

"Look at you. Still trying to protect me and you're the one in the hospital bed." Blaine bit his lip, "I love you." Blaine started, "You don't know how scared I was, that you'd leave me and Lily... and on top of that the last words we'd spoke to each other. I didn't want it to be left like that."

"Blaine," Kurt reached up and stroked his husband's hair, "Stop being a dramatic sap."

"Kurt, I'm serious." Blaine's eyebrows crinkled with concern. Blaine had a lot to think about during Kurt's unconscious state. Specifically their marriage of eleven years. His affair plagued most of his thoughts during the hours he waited for Kurt to wake. Sadly, he settled on the same conclusion he did before, he _would not_ tell Kurt.

If there was anything this accident had done for Blaine, it was make him realize how it would feel... being so close to losing Kurt. Can you imagine how Kurt would react to Blaine's affair? He knew Kurt was an extremely forgiving person, just look at Karofsky, the guy had threatened to _kill_ him and when they ran into him at the grocery store, Kurt chatted him up like they were old buddies, but somehow this seemed worse. He didn't know if Kurt would try to work things out, or just pack up and leave and that's what kept him from uttering a word about it.

Blaine had a little problem to take care of to insure his secret was safe though: Sebastian Smythe.

* * *

><p>After a couple of weeks, the hospital assured Kurt's family that he was absolutely ready to be taken out of care and back home. As long as Kurt stayed away from strenuous activities until his ribcage healed, and refreshed the bandage on his torso, he would be fine. The family trip Kurt had initially planned got thwarted, but Blaine promised him they'd reschedule again next month.<p>

Honestly, Blaine didn't want to return to work, he actually did beg and plead to take another entire week off to stay in Ohio, but to no avail. He didn't want to go back when he'd been so close to losing Kurt and his return to work meant a confrontation with Sebastian Smythe was inevitable.

"Did you call Rachel to come and visit today?" Blaine looked worriedly at Kurt who layed in PJs flipping through soap operas on their room's television.

"I'll be fine with Lily Blaine, honestly. I've been getting nothing, but visitors this past month." Kurt pouted.

"I'm just worried about you, I haven't left you for more than ten minutes since the accident. Except when they had you in surgery of course." Blaine reached for his work binder, dressed for work in a neatly pressed suit.

"I'm fine Blaine. Thank you for caring." Kurt turned his attention to Blaine, "Now do I get a goodbye kiss?" he asked timidly.

Blaine smiled back at Kurt, leaning down over the bed to place his lips on his husband's, he broke the kiss with a wet smack. "I'll be home at four, I love you. Don't be afraid to call me if you need anything." Blaine turned on his heel and left for a surely interesting day.

At work, Blaine successfully avoided Sebastian for a total amount of four hours. He'd just popped into the break room and began to pour himself a cup of coffee, when he felt a hand glide across his stomach, he backed away in surprise.

"Oh, jumpy today tiger?" Sebastian wagged his eyebrows, "I've missed you."

Blaine wiped off his shirt a couple of times, as if trying to remove dirt then proceeded to grab his mug off the counter, "We have to talk Sebastian."

"Hotel or my place?" Sebastian rushed excitedly, breathing down Blaine's neck.

Blaine walked around him and sat himself down on the break room table, "Here. We're j_ust talking._"

Sebastian looked flustered for a minute before leaning casually against the table near Blaine's seat, "What's up?"

"I-I lead you on, into thinking I had feelings that I truly didn't. I think this should end now." Blaine tested the ground a bit, Sebastian waited quietly for him to finish, "I realize that what I did was a big mistake Sebastian, I didn't want to hurt anybody, but something has to give. I love Kurt and I love my daughter Lily. I'm sorry Sebastian. We can't be together anymore." Blaine confessed.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him Blaine."

"Wh-what?" Blaine's face bunched up in disgust for a second. "No, no. If we keep this going, he _will _know and it's not only him that will get hurt, it's Lily, and it's _me. _I'm already hurt Sebastian, I'm hurt because I know I'm giving Kurt a reason to not trust me, to not trust his _husband._"

"So what? You're just going to drop me? Kurt wasn't there when you were feeling down, it was me. Remember that?" Sebastian straightened now.

"I realize you thought you were helping me, but it's not like that Sebastian... what we did only made it worse. A lot worse."

"You know what? I should have known you wouldn't appreciate what I've done for you. I should have known not to trust someone who's married and willing to fuck someone else so _enthusiastically_ on the side." Sebastian gripped his work papers off of the break table.

Blaine winced at Sebastian's crude statement, "Sebastian, I'm really sorry. I didn't want to start this."

"Fuck off." Sebastian spat before walking towards his cubicle.

"Wait! Wait!" Blaine leaped from his chair, gripping Sebastian arm, "You're not going to tell Kurt right? You know it'd get us _both_ in trouble, here at the office I mean." Blaine sputtered.

Sebastian slowly turned to face Blaine, "We'll just have to see." he shook Blaine's hand off.

"Sebastian don't do this." Blaine spoke desperately.

"Or what?" Sebastian teased.

"Look," Blaine's eyes darted around the office a bit "What do you want from me?"

Sebastian appeared to be in deep thought for a minute before answering seriously, "For you to suffer." He smiled endearingly and sauntered off, with _a bit_ more confidence this time.

Blaine's blood ran cold.

* * *

><p>Kurt pecked Lily's forehead before quietly moving over her sleeping form. He didn't realize it, but he really did miss doing his typical motherly tasks around his family's home. He was excited to find a new chicken alfredo recipe, he was <em>sure<em> Blaine would love, chicken alfredo after all was his favorite meal. Before he even started dinner he even did some deep cleaning around the household: mopping, scrubbing the bathroom, wiping the windows, and organizing his wardrobe... again.

_Yep, it's great to be back home. _Kurt thought. He hummed while carefully whisking the creamy alfredo sauce bubbling on his stove top. He stopped for a second after hearing the home phone ring; he sighed and placed his sauce on the back burner before rushing out of the kitchen.

"Anderson-Hummel household!" Kurt chipped.

"Kurt I assume?" a voice spoke gravely.

Kurt tucked the phone onto his shoulder to free both of his hands, "Yes, this is Kurt. May I ask who's speaking?" this voice was not familiar.

"Hi Kurt. This is Sebastian Smythe. I'm Blaine's co-worker, you might of heard of me." the man continued.

"Oh, yes. I've heard lots about you..." Kurt nodded. Blaine always spoke adamantly when discussing his conversations with Sebastian and the tasks they both tackled at work."

Confused as to why a co-worker would be calling, Kurt asked the only thing he could come up with "Is something wrong? Is Blaine okay?"

"Blaine's fine." Sebastian shook off that notion quickly, "Listen, Kurt. I got enlightened today and I feel I should come clean to you about something."

Kurt was even more confused now, "Uh... What about?"

"Kurt. I'm sorry I have to tell you this, it's about your husband and I."

It wouldn't hit Kurt until he said it. At this moment in his life, in Kurt's eyes, Blaine was a man not capable of doing something like this.

"Kurt." Sebastian spoke, "Your husband and I have been in an affair for a while now."

Somehow Kurt didn't believe the voice on the other side of line sounded at all apologetic or at the very least sympathetic.

"Excuse me?" Kurt let out a laugh, "Are you playing with me?"

"I'm not lying Kurt. What have I ever had against you or Blaine for that matter? Kurt, think about all those _extended _business trips your husband has been on, and the late nights at work. He was with me Kurt. He took me out on dates and he even slept with me. It's all in the bills Kurt, just look it up and... of course if you want the real work schedule you'd probably have to call Blaine's boss, but yeah." Sebastian babbled on.

Kurt didn't respond.

"So... yeah. There you have it." Sebastian trailed awkwardly, "Uh, if you have anymore questions, feel free to call back!"

_Click. _

Kurt stood with the phone next to his ear for a good twenty seconds before numbly placing the phone back on the hook, he dragged his feet to the edge of his bed and slowly sat down. He literally stared at the carpet for five minutes before actually allowing himself to _think._

Blaine found him like that when he returned at work, an _hour_ early, just thinking on the edge of their bed.

"Kurt?" Blaine placed his work binder on the nightstand before turning back to his husband.

Kurt was a lot of things, but conniving was not one of them. He didn't search or rummage through any of Sebastian's suggestions and he certainly did not jump to conclusions. He wouldn't consider any of this serious until he knew from Blaine.

"I got a call today." Kurt began, his eyes void of feeling.

Blaine made sure to return early, hoping to squash any suspicions by saying he and Sebastian had gotten into an argument before he called, but it was too late.

"Oh? Who from?" Blaine pretended to be oblivious.

"Your co-worker, Sebastian Smythe." Kurt searched Blaine's eyes for a sign.

Blaine drew a blank stare, "Oh, did he call to apologize? You know, he and I got in a fight today. Things got pretty ugly." Blaine pretended to ramble.

"He said some pretty crazy things Blaine." Kurt sat perfectly still.

Blaine sat next to Kurt, giving him a peck on the cheek, "Did he scream at you? I'm sorry honey, I know he can get pretty immature sometimes."

"He said you were cheating on me... with him."

"What? No, of course not!" Blaine shook his head, feigning shock.

Kurt saw it then. Saw what he'd been refusing to see for nearly half the year. The glint in his eye and the tone of his voice, he'd seen it when Blaine waved goodbye on his recent business trips, he'd heard it when he called apologizing about having to stay up late for work. It clicked into place then, why Blaine often started dodging Kurt's welcome home kisses and went straight for the shower. Kurt even started to realize their sex life was completely lacking, he realized with horror they hadn't done _anything _sexual for over _two months_. He realized, not only had Blaine been lying to him... he'd been lying to himself. He'd been in complete denial, he tricked himself into thinking everything was okay. He didn't want to believe, and could not believe that his lover of thirteen years, husband of eleven, would cheat on him.

Blaine, the man who had stood beside him. The man who had proposed to him, who he had witty bickering with, who he'd consoled in for the better part of his life. Blaine betrayed him.

Blaine shifted nervously, noticing Kurt's emotionless state, "You don't believe him do you? Kurt?"

"Why are you lying?" Kurt questioned, his eyes suddenly brimmed with tears.

"I'm not lying Kurt. Why would you believe _him_ over me?" Blaine's facade was quickly falling with every word. He tried to hide the fear on his face, the regret, but he'd been holding it in for far too long. He let it fall for just a second, letting a single drop fall down his cheek. He reached out his hand to comfort his husband.

Kurt slapped his hand off, "_Don't touch me!" _he hissed.

Blaine stopped, taken a back by Kurt's sudden rage.

"You-You... I can't." Kurt turned his head away for a moment.

"I'm _sorry_." Blaine sobbed. "It was a mistake. I'm sorry." he attempted to reach out to Kurt again, this time his husband rose to his feet, whipping his body to look down on his husband.

"How long?" Kurt knew he didn't need to explain.

"Five months," Blaine cowered, "He didn't mean anything to me, I promise you. I didn't love him, I love you."

"You love me?" Kurt let out a breathy laugh, "I don't believe that anymore. I don't believe you." He placed his hand over his mouth for a moment in disbelief then continued, "Did you have sex with him?"

Blaine didn't answer; he looked down at his feet

"Did you take him out to dinner? Buy him gifts?" Kurt pushed.

"I'm sorry."

Kurt ran his hands through his hair, turning away from the man who suddenly stirred such deep hatred in him. He hated that he loved him. It infuriated him that he'd chosen this man to give his heart to.

Kurt paused before asking the question with the answer he feared the most, "D-Did you tell him, you loved him?"

At this point Blaine's face was already dripping with tears, "I didn't mean it."

"I don't know anymore." Kurt whispered to himself. He rushed out, walking at a fast pace to Lily's room. He shut the door firmly behind him before collapsing on the single chair beside his daughter's bed.

Kurt stared at her innocent face, her peaceful state of sleep and cried as silently as he could manage. A million images, fears, doubts, and questions fled through his mind. Was it him? Was he not enough for Blaine anymore? Did Blaine regret marrying him? Maybe Blaine was dissatisfied with the sex. Kurt didn't know, and what about Lily?

Lily was such a young girl, with a lot to look forward in her future. A high school education, college, a career in whatever her heart desired, a boy to fall in love with, but now whether or not she'd have a parents to look up to as a prime example of companionship was undecided. Yes, Kurt and Blaine would always be Lily's fathers, but now Kurt was worried about what exactly they would be to her.

Kurt wasn't sure if it was healthy for Lily to see her fathers stay together, because he wasn't sure if he could still love Blaine. What would it do to her, if she saw him miserable in this relationship? It would probably destroy her outlook on marriage. He also knew breaking it off with Blaine could affect Lily and also destroy her outlook on marriage. It didn't have to be like that though, he was sure it could work out both ways. Kurt could try to work it out and maybe _somehow _forgive Blaine or Kurt could leave... and one of them could definitely move on with someone else.

Lily stirred, before blinking hard a few times. Kurt wiped the tears from his face; he didn't want Lily to know about this.

"Daddy?" Lily looked confused. She rubbed her eyes, before sitting straight up in her bed.

"Hey there sleepy head." Kurt tried to sound happy, but his throat was strained.

"What's wrong Daddy? Have you been crying?" Lily looked accusingly at Kurt's puffy eyes.

"Nothings wrong Lily. Why don't you go watch some television, I'm going to order pizza tonight." Kurt rose from his seat.

"I thought you were making pasta daddy."

Kurt laughed quietly, she was too observant for her own good. "Pizza sounds more delicious now though." Kurt made an excuse. He actually didn't feel like cooking at all, he preferred rolling into a tight ball and weeping until he was sure his tear ducts were incapable of producing anything.

Lily didn't question any further and happily opened the door, running towards the parlor. He took a deep breath, he was exhausted from all the emotion, but he knew he'd have to end his conversation with Blaine. Kurt patted through the hallway passing his room, first making sure Lily was completely engrossed in television. He heard Blaine shuffling in their bedroom, he turned to walk back. Blaine stood awkwardly next to their bed, arms limp like noodles at his sides, he tilted his head hopefully to Kurt who stood leaning against the door frame. They both embraced the tense silence for a moment.

Kurt was the first to speak, "Blaine. I don't know what you were thinking, I don't know what it was that prompted you to start this affair, but I do know you've put our relationship at risk for it. Y-You've put our entire family at risk." Kurt breathed, "Please tell me, give me some excuse, some _viable_ excuse as to why I should even consider trying to fix something that you broke _consciously_. Am I not good enough anymore? Did I do something wrong? What was it?"

Blaine approached Kurt cautiously, standing at a decent distance before replying, "It was never you Kurt. _I love you_. You're perfect the way you are." Blaine used a tone of conviction that quickly switched to a flustered state, "I didn't think. I just- I didn't think 'I am starting an affair at this point.' I didn't think 'I could possibly lose Kurt if I go further.' or 'What about Lily?' it just happened and it was too late to take it back." Blaine dropped his head, "But Kurt,_ I am_ thinking now and _I am_ feeling now and I promise you that I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust again to keep this family together. I promise that I love you, that I never loved him. I know that doesn't mean much to you now and I think you have every right not to trust me right now, but please let me prove it to you."

"Three months." Kurt stated simply.

"What?" Blaine questioned.

"I'm going to try this out for three months. If it doesn't work out by three months, I'm filing for divorce."

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><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I know. I know. Not as angst filled as the first chapter and _yes I_ have read from a few of you that you wanted me to emphasize Kurt's injuries and possibly keep him in a coma to teach Blaine a lesson. Let me explain though, I did put the accident to help Blaine out, but Blaine coming to a _complete _realization _without_ Kurt being close to dying, to me, shows even more love. . . Now please hit that review button… please?


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** I honestly was not planning on updating tonight because I was contemplating whether or not this would be the last chapter. Well, you might be happy to hear, I'm planning on writing one more. I know some of you are probably thinking "WHAT! Even that's short." But if you really think about my initial plan, which was this being a one-shot, this is extremely long. Sorry, making no compromises.

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><p>Initially, Blaine is puzzled. Why three months? It seemed like such a dragged out time limit, but at the same token it seemed incredibly short to repair an eleven-year marriage. Kurt explained that he didn't expect their relationship to return to it's previous state by that time, he just expected to <em>know <em>if he even wanted their relationship to work out. It saddened Blaine that Kurt was still unsure about staying with him, but agreed without any protest, just grateful Kurt was even mulling over the possibility of keeping him.

Blaine knew he was going to take a lot of slack through these three months, but knew it was well deserved and well worth it to earn his companion's trust again. Blaine even suggests that they higher a psychiatrist to help them move along, but is confused to hear Kurt does not want that.

"I know our relationship faltered, but this doesn't mean I want to let in some stranger to ask me how I feel, how you feel, or how we should go about building our relationship. You have to realize we can think and feel for _ourselves_, I know some people think it'll be better when a bald guy with a PhD tells them their relationship is on the right track, but _I won't_ feel better. Believe me, I'll know if I feel like our relationship is on the right track." Kurt argues.

Blaine remained seated in the dinning room, phonebook splayed out before him on the table, "I know you think it's ridiculous, but don't you think you're getting a bit too prideful? It's okay to let someone else in, especially if we need the help. If it increases our chances of being together, I'm willing and _happy_ to pay every penny. Don't you think that's worth it?"

Kurt stays silent.

Blaine quickly cuts in, noticing Kurt's struggle to answer the question "Look, we'll just try it out and if we don't like the first couple of appointments...we cancel it. Okay?"

"Okay."

After that conversation Blaine immediately set up a psychiatrist to help salvage their marriage. His name is Dr. Marcus, and Kurt can't help but to scoff the first day he catches a glimpse of him, viewing paperwork behind his luxurious executive desk. _He's bald._ Bald with black-framed glasses and a grey suit that screams, "I went to Oxford!"

Kurt is quickly deterred from his skeptical observation when he feels Blaine gently nudge him with his elbow, giving him a pleading glance. _All right, all right, I'll give Dr. Oxfor- Dr. Marcus a chance. _He thought. He sunk down into the uncomfortable red leather couch, sliding back with an accompanying squeak. He turns to his husband, noticing his eager expression when listening to Dr. Marcus, as if he expected the man to pull out a ticket that insures a 100% chance of marriage success. If only, if only.

Dr. Marcus shook both of their hands out of courtesy before going back behind his desk to sit on his studious office chair. "Kurt and Blaine Anderson-Hummel," Dr. Marcus read to himself off a wad of papers, "It's a pleasure, to finally meet you two."

"Thank you for having us," Blaine began, "We're grateful to get help."

Kurt didn't even attempt to not look bored. He stared at anything, but Dr. Marcus. His sights were set on the hideous wallpaper and his thoughts on the designer's failure to get an English vibe, it just comes off as tacky instead.

This behavior doesn't go unnoticed by Dr. Marcus, who stares observantly at Kurt's expressions, "So, who set up our sessions and what exactly brought you to this decision?"

"Well, I called to set up the sessions, _Kurt and I _decided it'd help with our marriage." Blaine answered fervently.

Dr. Marcus turned his attention back to Kurt. Kurt was now running his index finger along to the couch's armrest. Dr. Marcus coughed loudly and spoke, "Is that right Kurt?"

Kurt snapped his head towards the person calling his name, "Yep." he confirmed.

"You don't seem very excited to be here." Dr. Marcus went on.

"No, I'm not excited about repairing a relationship I'm not even sure I want fixed. I'm not even a little excited at the thought of returning to a man who cheated on me." Kurt looked confused, "I thought that would be obvious."

Blaine stiffened; he turned his head to Kurt, his face crumpled into an unreadable expression. His expression soon turned back to resolve before he turned to face Dr. Marcus again.

"Alrighty then." Dr. Marcus nodded, he jotted down something with his pen on a piece of paper before raising his head again.

Blaine looked horrified, as if he'd just realized Kurt had spit out the wrong answer for a test.

"I'd like to start from the beginning, with Blaine. Tell me how everything started before you set up an appointment." Dr. Marcus turned to Kurt then, "Now I understand there may be some disagreements about what happened, but I would like you to stay quiet while he tells his side of the story. I assure you, you will get your chance afterwards. Understood?"

Kurt nodded.

"Good, now Blaine, I don't want you to get too specific, but just tell me what you think is important."

Blaine expected that he'd have to do this since the day he signed up for the appointments, but that didn't seem to ease the feeling of dread in his gut. Blaine knotted his hands together, "Five months ago, Kurt and I got into a fight. He was upset I cancelled a break with the family, I had to work. We both said things we didn't mean and I ended up sleeping on the couch that night and when I went to work the next day, I was still angry." Blaine knew the next part would be the most difficult, "So, I talked about it with my co-worker Sebastian on a lunch break at some Chinese restaurant a few blocks from work. H-he seemed to care and he even agreed that I wasn't in the wrong and I felt a little better, you know? That someone appreciated my work."

Kurt's jaw tightened, it was visibly obvious he was having difficulty not saying something at this moment.

Dr. Marcus scribbled more notes throughout Blaine's story.

"I really didn't suspect Sebastian wanted to be anything more than friends, so when he mentioned he needed to pick something up on his way back to work, I didn't think anything of it. I didn't know it was his apartment, but I came up with him." Blaine stopped short; he gazed into Dr. Marcus's eyes, begging for understanding. "He kissed me and I didn't stop it. I-I didn't do anything when it got further, when he had sex." Blaine breathed. "The next day I was going to tell Kurt about it, but he was still upset with me. So, I went back and I kept on going back for five months a-and when I finally decided to stop, Kurt got into an accident." Blaine frowned, "I didn't want to tell Kurt, I was too afraid. I didn't want our marriage to end, I love Kurt. I-I didn't do this because I didn't love him and I didn't not tell him because I wanted to be disloyal, I-I just messed up...Sebastian ended up telling Kurt after I broke it off with him."

"Is that all?" Dr. Marcus's face stayed in an analytical manner.

"Yes." Blaine nodded.

"Kurt, your story." Dr. Marcus eyed Kurt warily, he knew from Kurt's cold expression he didn't have the best comments to say pertaining to Blaine's interpretation.

"Blaine hadn't taken more than a day off for five years, until recently when I was about to _croak_" Kurt started in a snarky manner, "So, when he backed out on the week vacation he _promised, _yes I _was _upset. I'd been worried about Blaine overworking himself those past five years and frankly, I missed my husband. You know the man I married? I wanted to spend time with that guy. It wasn't that I didn't appreciate his work; I just _appreciated him _more than his work. Anyways, It wasn't much different than a lot of other fights we've had in our marriage in the past, so I didn't feel like anything had changed. Especially, when he slept with me a week afterwards, telling me he loved me and all the gooey bullshit stuff that I had _obviously_ fallen for." Kurt tapped his fingers lightly on the couch's armrest.

Blaine winced, "Kurt I-"

"Blaine." Dr. Marcus warned sternly.

"So, we moved on from that fight. We seemed to be doing great, despite that rough patch. I noticed Blaine seemed to be distancing himself, but I didn't suspect a thing. Not in my wildest dreams or nightmares should I say, did I ever think Blaine Anderson-Hummel was capable of cheating on me. Not a bit. But then ya' know, his 'work' started getting more and more time consuming, and we started drifting further and further apart. So, I set up a family trip, I was worried. I wanted to reconnect. I ended up in a hospital bed and when I returned from my near death experience, imagine my surprise when Sebastian calls and tells me he's been fucking my husband behind my back. And here we are!" Kurt slaps Blaine on the lap, feigning enthusiasm.

Blaine jumped a bit at the unexpected contact.

"Is there anything else you'd like to reveal?" Dr. Marcus pauses, waiting to write an additional confession.

Blaine turned his eyes curiously towards Kurt, hoping he wasn't the only one who did a major fuck up.

"Oh yeah!" Kurt chimes happily, "Over the course of our eleven year marriage, I got sex propositions from _seven different guys_, and I turned them _all _down. 'Cause ya' know, I had a husband and all that jazz." Kurt motioned to Blaine and offered him a sarcastic smile.

Blaine choked; he looked like he was about to burst in tears.

Dr. Marcus sighed,"Kurt, I can clearly see that you are upset and you are perfectly entitled to be upset," he raised a hand to stop Kurt from speaking, "_but _if we want to get more progress, I'm going to have to ask you to tone down your bark a notch."

Kurt bit his tongue, "_Fine."_

* * *

><p><em>One month later...<em>

Kurt and Blaine's psychiatry sessions played an important part in repairing their relationship, but of course what they did and spoke about outside, was far more critical.

Throughout their sessions it became evident, the fact that Blaine still worked with Sebastian was clearly not helping matters. Kurt could try to stay unsuspecting as hard as he wanted, but his trust virtually imploded they day he found out Blaine had cheated.

Blaine enjoyed climbing the corporate ladder and loved being the breadwinner of the family, but made a clear choice that indeed Kurt and Lily came before his career desires. He decided to turn in his work boots after working at Daser Insurance Co. for nearly eight years, insisting that he would eventually find another job.

Kurt took this opportunity to jump back on the working wagon, handing down the housewife baton to Blaine. Before his bout as a stay-at-home husband, Kurt worked in the fashion industry as one of the top designers for various brand names. Blaine was both surprised in a bit jealous after finding out Kurt's previous employers had been begging for his return, the day he backed out. Blaine's only strong point, being the money earner, was now thwarted.

Even though Blaine hadn't had much experience in taking children, he agreed to watch Lily. Along with that, Kurt and Blaine agreed she would begin attending school once the year started up again. This way, Blaine and Kurt had more opportunities to work on their relationship.

Once their household arrangements are set, they both plunged into their duties, and tried their best to get into the groove.

Instead of being angry, Kurt finds it endearing when he returns home from work to discover the house in an absolute mess with Lily taking a nap on his husband's chest, paint staining both of their clothes and hair. They both look exhausted.

It's been a long day for both Kurt _and _Blaine, these new adjustments were still difficult getting used to. Kurt carefully treads out of the room, avoiding waking up the two slumbering forms, and heads for the shower. When he gets out, he's surprised to see Blaine in the kitchen, actually attempting to make something.

Blaine turned his head away from the cooking pot and noticed Kurt staring from the kitchen's entrance in awe. Blaine smiled brightly and moved away from the stove top, hoping his husband would meet him halfway. Kurt remained still in the doorway and instead Blaine stopped short halfway through the kitchen. They hadn't kissed since Kurt found out about the affair and Blaine is painfully aware of that. Over the first week, he'd tried to lean in a couple times to get a quick peck, only to be left in Kurt's wake.

"Hey, Babe." Blaine moves from foot to foot awkwardly, "Just making some dinner."

Kurt couldn't help but to giggle at that. The words seemed so unnatural coming from _Blaine. _Blaine making dinner. Blaine cooking.

Blaine casted Kurt a confused glance, "What?" he returns back to the stove top to dipping a wooden spoon into the pot.

"Nothing." Kurt struggles to keep a straight face, "What are you making?" he's honestly curious.

"Spaghetti." Blaine spoke, "Why were you laughing? Am I making it wrong?" Blaine turned to Kurt.

"No, I don't think so." Kurt stepped out of the doorway to lean over Blaine. He turned his head at the other pot containing some unfamiliar tomato sauce and then back to Blaine stirring the hamburger. "It looks great, but where are the noodles?"

"Eh." Blaine scratches the back of his head, sending Kurt a shy smile. "I've got to go to the store for a quick run. Can you watch the sauce?"

Kurt broke into a hearty laugh.

"Hey, I'm trying here." Blaine pouted. "I did take care of Lily all day and let me just say Kurt, she's a handful that one. I don't know how you did it all these years."He leaned over and gave Kurt a quick kiss on the mouth, "I'll be right back." he stopped for a second, realizing what he just did.

Kurt stood rigid for a second, and then dropped his shoulders trying to relax. It's enough time for Blaine to notice, but instead of confronting Kurt about it, he rushes to the store.

When Blaine returns from the store, he ends up completely scorching the noodles, to the point where it sticks in fat globs to the bottom of the pot. Blaine just orders Chinese instead.

* * *

><p><em>Two months latter...<em>

It felt like Blaine was courting again, with the flowers, the dates, and shy kisses. It was odd really. He'd known Kurt _thirteen_ _years_, and it wasn't like they'd never engaged in sex before. This entire process was incredibly frustrating and yet humbling to Blaine. It made him realize how much he'd taken for granted from his husband.

This particular night Blaine took Kurt out to dinner, at a five star restaurant they use to eat at early in their relationship. It went really well, at least to Blaine's knowledge. The conversation never spiraled down, it was engaging, interesting, and flirtatious. The food was delicious; he even got to squeeze a real smile out of his husband. Even after their meal was finished, they talked adamantly on the way home.

And suddenly here they were on the parlor couch, making out like seventeen-year-old teenagers. It seemed thrilling, for the married couple that hadn't done such a thing in years especially with Lily on their hands. Thank God for Rachel Berry their longtime friend and newly discovered babysitter.

Blaine's got his tongue halfway down Kurt's throat, and there are hands all over the place. Desperate groping and moaning, Kurt lightly nipping at Blaine's lips occasionally. Blaine's stroking Kurt's thigh, earning a small gasp. Blaine takes this as a signal to go further, and his tight pants won't think otherwise.

"_Kurt._" he nearly growls.

While sucking a nice red blotch into on the bottom of Kurt's neck, he reaches down and cups Kurt's ass to ease them into a lying position. He sends his hands around Kurt's body, stroking up and down, Kurt moans in appreciation. When Blaine finally snakes a hand around and starts to unfasten Kurt's buckle, that's when things fall apart.

Kurt suddenly stops kissing back. Blaine doesn't feel the tears against his cheek until he's got his fly open, he freezes.

Kurt starts sobbing uncontrollably into Blaine's neck. Blaine's really confused and worried now, "Did I hurt you? Kurt? What's wrong?" Blaine props himself up on his arms to look at his husband's face.

Kurt just shakes his head, tears streaming down his face. He doesn't look Blaine in the eye and flinches from his touch and that's when it hits him. Blaine knows why Kurt is crying. He knows what Kurt's thinking about.

Blaine knows he's defiled their most intimate connection and he can't take it back.

Blaine_ did _hurt Kurt.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Eek. Forgive me (See what I did there?). I know this is littered with grammatical errors and constant switching between tenses, but really… 23ewafdsaf It's 12:20 in the morning and feel like I'm living an alternate identity because I refuse to save this fic on my computer before a family member finds it. Nobody knows I do this stuff, and did I mention my mother would freak out? But no worries I can vote, if you know what I mean. So, yeah the three-month mark is coming next AKA the last chapter. Thank you to those of you who commented and your suggestions, I used quite a few of them. Reviews are absolutely positively appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** This is the last chapter, I hope it's to your liking and I'll meet you at the bottom of the page.

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><p>Lily isn't in the Anderson-Hummel household today; Rachel volunteered to take her out for an entire day. She also pushed to find out <em>why<em> exactly Kurt went back to work and _why_ Kurt and Blaine were suddenly taking an extraordinary amount of time off. Kurt immediately brushed it off, he hadn't told anyone about the affair and honestly he felt like it wasn't anyone's business. The only person who should _possibly_ know was Lily and she was just too young - to fragile to give that kind of information. Blaine didn't ask him to keep quiet, but he also didn't advertise his past infidelity. All Kurt knew was Lily couldn't be around today, at the three month mark, with an inevitable discussion looming overhead. A discussion Kurt rather not have their daughter attend.

Blaine was calm and composed on the outside... but inside? He was a complete and utter wreck. He'd poured in his undivided attention into his family to the brim, until he was sure they were both tired of his company and sure that it was _obvious_ he was trying. Kurt and Blaine had been on a grand total of seventeen dates, he'd slept every night of the past three months at home, made sure his whereabouts were always known, took care of and played with Lily, supported his husband's career. Blaine told Kurt he loved him multiple times everyday and tried to present it through his actions as well, starting with petty things such at flowers and chocolates all the way up to devout speeches about every part of Kurt's personality and body he adored so much. Blaine hadn't seen Sebastian the day he quit his job and stayed firmly faithful to his husband. He didn't like to bring his affair, but he did apologize constantly to Kurt at unnecessary and necessary moments.

Blaine was _still _a complete wreck because despite all of the things he did to prove his devotion, the damage seemed so catastrophic that his good deeds seemed to pale in comparison. His actions appeared to be even _more_ fruitless when Dr. Marcus dug up some other detail about his past with Sebastian. The day Kurt found out he'd taken Sebastian to the same restaurant he proposed to Kurt at, the entire week had been littered with one-sided conversations. Whenever Kurt broke down swearing to god he hated Blaine and he was sick of him and began to fall into hysterical sobbing, all Blaine could do was hold him tight and whisper into the crook of his neck his undying love and beg for forgiveness.

Kurt came off as unsure to this very day, no matter how much Blaine assured him he meant the world to him, that he was more than enough for him, that he loved him, and he loved his family - the looks Kurt gave him back - they weren't satisfied. Blaine didn't know if this meant Kurt wouldn't be willing to go further or if it was something they would continue to work on.

It all depended on today's conversation, which Kurt and Blaine hadn't discussed at all and didn't plan to until their breakfast was completed. Kurt insisted that he missed cooking and whipped up some simple scrambled eggs with bacon. And they both settled down once they took their servings.

Blaine spoke while pouring orange juice into his glass, "So, what's on the agenda for today?" he pushed lightly. He wasn't sure how Kurt wanted to go about revealing his decision.

Kurt continued to chew on his piece of bacon while speaking back, "I think we should walk to Central Park today and have a little picnic for lunch. "

Blaine took a gulp of his orange juice, thinking over Kurt's plan. He wasn't sure what Kurt's intentions were, but decided to take Kurt's pace, "Should I make us something?"

Kurt smiled, "I'll just order us something from that little deli shop nearby and we can pick up a bottle of wine."

"Sounds like a plan."

After clearing the table and washing their dishes, the couple dressed casually and headed down from their apartment, picnic basket and blanket in tow.

It was nice to see the industrial streets of New York. The tall skyscrapers, the impeccably dressed business suits rushing through crowds, all stuck in their own life's web, uncaring and unaware of the two men strolling to their possible last date together.

Blaine threaded his fingers with Kurt's, holding on tightly while he plowed through the crowd onto a much more secluded street; one where they could walk slowly, he definitely didn't want to rush things. He doesn't let go once they start walking at a leisurely pace, glad to feel connection - the warmth of his husband's fingers. He looks to his side then, at Kurt's pale smooth skin and his lovely jawline. Kurt doesn't stare back.

It takes about a half an hour to reach their deli shop, and soon they make it to Central Park. It's populated as expected, but they're able to spread their blanket in a perfectly secluded spot with luscious green grass under a tree. The sun is bright and beaming, with only a minimum amount of clouds. Other civilians are close enough to hear, but far enough to not get what they're saying.

Kurt lays his legs flat against the blanket, Blaine folds his legs in, and then they both settle into an awkward pause. They don't speak to each other for a few moments, just letting everything sink it. The entire situation. Kurt sighs before gently nudging a fallen leaf off of their picnic blanket and looks at Blaine, "The park usually isn't this empty on such a beautiful day." he comments.

Blaine tilts his head, smiling at Kurt's attempt at small talk, "I love you."

Kurt looks uncomfortable, and begins to play with grass by the side of their blanket, "I thought we could relieve some of inevitable tension by coming here, having bottle of wine, on nice sunny day..." before Blaine can comment, Kurt asks, "Can you open the bottle of wine? We'll have a glass now."

Blaine closes his mouth, instead reaching for their basket, he pops it open and grabs the wine bottle,"It is helping a little." Blaine admits while digging a corkscrew into the bottle's top. He doesn't let on that he's a bit worried about being in public during such an intimate conversation. He pops the cork out and pours a modest amount into the glasses Kurt holds out.

Kurt hands Blaine a glass and takes a dignified gulp of wine before bringing his own down, "I guess it's about time."

Blaine fiddles with his glass, puts it down, and looks at Kurt, "We don't need to hurry or anything Kurt, we'll go at your pace." he wants to know the answer, but at the same time he's afraid.

"No. I want to do this now." Kurt gently pushes, "I've had more than enough time to think about it, I'm tired of thinking about it." He stops for a few beats.

"Do you still love me?" Blaine doesn't mean to get emotional so fast, but it's clear it's already gotten far by the gleam in his eyes. Blaine wants to - needs to know. Could he have fucked it up that bad? So bad that _Kurt _would fall out of love with him? It seemed like such a cold and foreign idea, for his husband to not love him. This past decade, Blaine was never sure if his parents loved him, but Kurt... he was always certain did. Now? He wasn't sure and it _scared_ him, it kept him up almost every night, the concept clawed at him.

Kurt attempts to buy some time by drinking the rest of his wine and placing it in the basket. He looks at Blaine and opens his mouth then closes it again. He turns his head away then.

Blaine notices the tears pouring down Kurt's face then,"_Kurt?_" Blaine urges. "I'm not going to use it against you Kurt, if you do. I-I just want to _know_."

Kurt wants to say he's not sure, like he has been these past three months. Both answers seem hard to say, but especially the one he's about to say now... "I don't think so."

Blaine reels back, he's about to lift himself off the blanket and stomp around the park in pure rage, but after a few seconds it registers even further and his heart drops. _Kurt doesn't love him. _His _husband_ Kurt... He doesn't even realize he's in tears until he feels the liquid drop onto his shirt. He places his palm on his forehead and swipes his hair back. _Look at what you've done._

He screams inside.

"When? When did you know?" Blaine wanted to know more. Did Kurt ease into this lack of feeling or was it quick? What was the last day Kurt loved him?

"I don't know when exactly. I purposely tried to ignore it, but lately... almost every time I look at you it's hard to feel..." Kurt scrunches his forehead together, "anything... while thinking about what you did. Sometimes, I can push it at the back of my mind for hours, but it always comes back. "

Blaine bunches the blanket beneath his hands, his muscles tensing, he's quiet for a minute then speaks, "I hate myself for what I did to you." he takes a deep breath, "Kurt, I know this is going to sound extremely cheesy, but I can't live without you. I can't picture it; I don't want to picture it. I know I can't take it back, but Kurt - just please. I won't go back to work, we'll make more appointments with Dr. Marcus, we'll go out on more dates, I'll prove my faithfulness to you...I will _never _cross you again. I'll make you see why we started this, why we've been together for so long Kurt - why we should still keep going. Just please... Kurt please" Blaine chokes, "_forgive me._"

"Blaine." Kurt speaks firmly, "It's not just about forgiving you anymore."

Blaine knows this, but he needs to stop Kurt from doing what he's about to do now. He needs Kurt to see that their marriage is worth another shot, to make Kurt fall in love with him again and he's determined to make it happen, "I know you may not love me, but I love you a-and we will - he looks flustered for a second "we'll work on your side."

"What if I don t want to stay together?" Kurt asks.

"No." Blaine shakes his head, he moves across the blanket then, gripping Kurt's hand, "Kurt, please. Don't give up on this, on us. We've got so much ahead of us, and I want you there beside me every step of the way."

Kurt's jaw starts to quiver, "It's so easy to believe you," he looks up "God, I want to believe you... I'm so grateful that you've been making an effort and saying sorry, because I know a lot of people who don't have that fortune, who die without hearing a single word of apology. But Blaine, I also hear about people who've heard thousands of empty apologies and promises. And I can't do it - I can't go through this again. I can't fall in love with you only to be broken down again."

"It will never happen again."

"Did you think an affair would ever happen before all of this started? How do you know you won't slip up again? What if you don't watch how much you drink one night and take a man home impaired? What if you're bored with our marriage and look elsewhere again?"

"I was never bored with our marriage, and Kurt especially considering what I've done - I've got more than enough initiative to avoid another affair at all costs."

Kurt snaps his jaw shut, "I already made up my mind before this conversation started." he slips his hand out of Blaine's, "I've had more than enough."

Blaine bunches his eyebrows, "Then why did you do this!" he cries, "Why did you want us to sit in the middle of Central Park, why did we buy this fucking wine, and sit on a picnic blanket!" he begins to shout.

Kurt's tears have stopped falling, but his face still shows streaks of tears, "I thought I owed it to our eleven years of marriage."

Blaine doesn't even bother to wipe away the relentless water covering his face, he just sobs, "Stay with me."

Blaine leans over to grab Kurt again, but Kurt moves faster. He stands up, looking down to Blaine, "I think I should leave now. I'll stay with Rachel tonight and I'll drop Lily off tomorrow so I can do the paperwork."

Blaine just cries in response, he swears he's never felt this much pain in his chest. Such a deep empty heart wrenching pain.

"Blaine," Kurt steps off of the blanket, looking his husband in the eye, "please don't let Lily see us like this." he turns and walks off, easily blending in with the crowd of people strolling the sidewalks of Central Park.

On that blanket, Blaine cries until there's no more tears left to give. He wraps up their blanket, uneaten sandwiches, wine, and walks back to the place that no longer feels like home.

Although Blaine's been sleeping on the couch these past three months, it's an entirely new feeling to know he's _really_ alone this time. To know he'll never get the chance to sleep with Kurt again, to stroke his cheek, to make love to him. If he'd known back then, that their love making back four months ago would be his last... He wouldn't have been so hasty. He would've taken the time to admire the smooth cleft of his chin, his beautiful skin, and the way he shivered when Blaine ran his hand down his side. Just the thought of a future without Kurt's scent on their bed, his cooking form in the kitchen, twisted Blaine's gut.

Blaine lays wide awake most of the night, eyes boring into the ceiling, all thoughts focused on how his husband Kurt would willingly step out of his life tomorrow.

When it's five in the morning and he's finally sure he won't get any sleep, he walks around the house, and memorizing all the details he knew would change. Kurt's shoes lined up by the side of the door, his apron hanging in the kitchen, the list of groceries he left on the fridge from last week.

Then Blaine decides to get ready for the day, remembering Kurt's last words to him. The only effort he can make though is splashing his face with water and slapping on some casual, but respectful clothes - he doesn't even bother to shave.

Blaine hears a car pull up outside and watches Kurt walk down the driveway with Lily. Kurt immediately sends Lily into the parlor with a few books and DVDs. He leans down and gives her a goodbye kiss then silently treads towards the exit at front of the house, he frowns when he sees Blaine's waiting there against the door.

"Hey Blaine." Kurt stops to acknowledge him out of simple courtesy and then begins walking again.

"Are you coming back after this?" Blaine questions, hopeful.

Kurt flinches at the question and turns to look at Blaine, "No, not unless I'm picking up Lily."

Blaine straightens up and takes a good look at Kurt. He reaches out to touch his husband's cheek, and moves his thumb over the soft skin there, he's surprised when Kurt doesn't pull away. Blaine's eyes well up with tears. After this things will never be the same.

With a heavy heart Blaine requests one last thing, "Can I kiss you goodbye?" his voice breaks at the end of his sentence.

Kurt shivers and lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, he allows himself to look into Blaine's eyes then and their wonderful hazel depths, the same ones that stole his heart on that staircase in Dalton. Kurt lays his palm on his cheek, over Blaine's hand, gripping it softly.

Blaine leans in, and their lips connect. They both move their mouths together, kissing feverishly. Desperate to take the last of something they know they will never have again. Blaine nips the bottom of Kurt's lips, then continues to open his mouth wider over Kurt's.

When Kurt breaks away, Blaine places his cheek against Kurt's, nuzzling his nose into his husband's neck. That does it. Kurt breaks and begins to weep and he cries into Blaine's shoulder.

Then Kurt whispers to himself, just enough for Blaine to hear, "_I wish I didn't love you._"

Blaine pauses and lifts his head to look at Kurt, "You love me?"

Kurt cries, "I'm sorry, it's just things would be so much easier if I didn't love you."

Blaine grips both of Kurt's hands into his own, "_You love me?_"

"Yes," Kurt sniffles, "Yes I do and it hurts so much."

Kurt's confession isn't what a husband would want to hear, but really... Kurt loves him. It's hard to not be happy right now.

Blaine cries and smiles at the same time, "_You love me." _he holds Kurt's hands tighter, "_We love each other._" Blaine is over the moon; he had never lost Kurt's love. They have a better chance together, it's not hopeless.

Kurt nods his head and smiles at how ridiculous Blaine looks through his sobbing.

"You'll stay? We'll be together, and you'll stay?" Blaine dares to push further.

Kurt bobs his head up and down again.

Blaine nearly pounces on Kurt, pushing their lips together again for a small sweet kiss then envelops Kurt in a tight hug, "_Oh, Kurt._ I love you... I love you so much."

Moving his arms to wrap around Blaine too, Kurt smiles against his husband's neck, "and I love you."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Guys, I'm so so sorry for the late update, but really it's technically a good thing because you have _no idea_ how close I was to writing a divorce. I was going to finish working on this chapter Friday night, but I got a call and ended up taking an unexpected short flight somewhere just _hours later_. I was incapable of using using the hospital's Internet connection, but I still wrote a divorce scene in before I went to sleep that night. The next day I was going to upload it, but when I tucked myself in to sleep on my aunt's floor, the kissing scene just hit me. I felt like it trumped the scene I'd written about Kurt giving Blaine back his wedding ring and that's how you got a very optimistic ending.

Another thing, thank you so much to those of you who commented, it keeps me going. Double thank you to the few of you who had written how they personally connected to my story. It really touches me - and really, I'm not even going to claim to closely connect to such a tragic thing, I just hope things work out.

I also want to point out, that I really only covered a small spectrum of what the consequences of cheating are. I purposely left out speaking a lot about how Lily would be affected because I wanted more focus on Kurt and Blaine.

Oh oh, and one last thing. This entire story was inspired by the _beautiful _heart wrenching song _Forgive Me by Missy Higgins_. If you haven't listened to it, _do it now_.


	5. Epilogue

While Kurt's picking up some pastries for Lily and Blaine one morning, he catches a glimpse of a couple through bakery's glass window. They're walking hand in hand, both of their fingers sporting a wedding ring. Their grey and white hair and wrinkles covering the expanse of their skin make Kurt wonder how long they've been together. He wonders if he could be like that with Blaine.

Later that night while he's flipping through some random channels, he catches a snippet of words mid-sentence that make him pause, a talk show host relays "- twenty percent of married men have cheated on their spouses."

Even though Kurt's sure this information isn't very reliable, it prompts him to think about that old married couple again and general divorce rates. Surely, whether people choose to believe it or not, there comes a point in every marriage where someone _wants to_ walk out the door. People are quick to admire couples who have been together nearly their entire lives, but leave their own marriages at the drop of a dime.

Having a lifelong companion, some people claim should be easy as breathing, but if you're not able to overcome threats to your marriage how will you ever know if your husband or wife really wants to be at your side or if they're willing to fight for you? Somewhere in his vows, Kurt's sure he said "for better, _for worse" _not "for better, and if things get _too bad_, I'll quit." Not to say people always have bad reasons for divorce, but Kurt really doesn't think _he_ has a good enough reason. Not when he still loves Blaine and Blaine loves him, and not when Blaine isn't giving him any more reason to.

"Babe?" Blaine pops his head into the bedroom door spotting Kurt, before walking inside.

"Hi." Kurt smiles, he's while sitting at the edge of the bed.

"What ya' watchin'?" Blaine bounces onto the bed playfully, to lay next to Kurt.

Kurt turns back to the television, "Some program about cheating spouses."

Blaine stiffens for a second, before turning to look at the television then back at Kurt. He hoists himself up on his elbows and begins to trace his fingers on his husband's back, frowning. Kurt doesn't back away; he just seems too engrossed in the television's hue.

"What's it saying?" Blaine doesn't even look at the show's host; instead he's staring at Kurt's reactions.

Kurt sighs at Blaine's question and reaches for the remote, he clicks the power button and the TV goes black, "Nothing."

"It's okay if you want to watch it Kurt." Blaine looks worriedly, "I was honestly curious."

"It's fine Blaine, don't worry. I was just channel surfing and stopped for a minute."

Blaine blinks a few times before sitting up straight, he lets his hands rest on his knees, "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm more than okay." Kurt smiles reassuringly, and then pecks Blaine on the lips.

Blaine blushes like a teenager, "Did I mention I love you today?" his eyes gloss over for a second.

"Only five times, but I do like to be reminded" Kurt remarks.

"Well, there you have it. I love you." He kisses Kurt's shoulder, "I love you." he kisses his neck, "_I love you._"

Kurt giggles before reaching around Blaine's neck and pulling him in. He sends his mouth over Blaine's and smiles against his lips before moving against him.

"_Hmm._" Blaine hums in approval before reciprocating the kiss.

Kurt gives Blaine and rough shove into the mattress then rolls over him. Hands are everywhere and moaning ensues before Blaine speaks up, "_Kurt." _he whines, "Kurt... Lily's still awake."

Kurt sends his lips into a pout before rolling off his husband, "_Fine._"

"It's okay baby, we can do something after her bedtime..." Blaine trails off suggestively.

"I'd like that." Kurt purrs.

Blaine chuckles before grabbing Kurt's hand and walking out of their room. They set up the dinning room table and call Lily into the kitchen to eat as a family.

Things aren't perfect in Blaine and Kurt's relationship, but they're holding strong. There are days where steamy arguments land Blaine back on the couch, but there are also days filled with irrevocable love.

Blaine and Kurt occasionally bump into Sebastian Smythe. He's still the same bitter snarky man Blaine left and he's quick to brag about his new conquests. Blaine can't believe he nearly lost his marriage to the man. Kurt just settles into the "Bitch back away from my man!" sort of thing and everything moves on smoothly.

Kurt can breathe mentally now, because _he has _forgiven Blaine.

Their secret is eventually revealed to Rachel not long after and she's _extremely_ disapproving, she clearly makes it known she thinks Blaine doesn't deserve to be forgiven.

Kurt silently counters "Marriage is sometimes about giving love when someone least deserves it."

And it's true, love sometimes isn't black or white, but it's _love_ and Kurt's sure of it.


	6. Outtake

**A/N: **I can't believe I wrapped up this outtake for you guys. It hurt my wittle heart. *SOB* If you didn't read my last author's note, you don't know what I'm talking about. This is the ending you guys were really close to having. Enjoy... or don't enjoy? :'(

* * *

><p>"I will fight to stay with you, you will never be able to ever say I let you go. I never will."<p>

Kurt is about to tell Blaine he wants him to let go, but really? He doesn't. The thought of Blaine cheating _and _letting him walk out of his life seems much more depressing. Kurt would never admit it, but he wants to see Blaine beg and grovel, so when he leaves he'll have that satisfaction of knowing he's wanted, the satisfaction that was taken away from him.

"I'm sorry Blaine." Kurt turns down to his paper again and continues to write, before he signs the last line he takes a good look at the husband he's signing off. He says _husband_ a good five times in his head before relenting. Blaine watches Kurt send the ball of his pen to the paper and write his elegant signature at the bottom of the page, a page that condemns their marriage.

Kurt backs out of the table, his chair scraps noisily against the wooden floor. Blaine just stares in disbelief. Kurt collects the papers off of the table, grabbing Blaine's empty pages.

Blaine's sure Kurt's about to take his leave, but he stops for a second before turning back to Blaine. Kurt touches his fingertips for a moment and Blaine whips his view down. He sees what he's about to do then, sees Kurt slide off the silver ring adorning his finger. The indention of skin where the ring previously laid is the only indication it was there.

He nearly jumps away when Kurt brings his hand forward, knowing what he's about to do. He doesn't want it. He won't take it. "I want you to keep it." he says.

Kurt stops, giving Blaine an emotionless glance; "It's best if you take it." he places it on the table.

Blaine numbly picks up the silver piece of jewelry, and pinches it between his thumb and forefinger. He places it in his breast pocket, even though it's now out of view, he's painfully aware of its presence.

Kurt opens his palm expectantly.

Blaine looks down and grazes his finger over his own wedding band, feeling the smooth expanse of gold. He wants to keep it, to keep its vow, but he knows he doesn't deserve it, he already broke his promise. He slides it off his finger, feeling it's absence immediately, but before he gives it to Kurt he makes another promise, "I will never love another man like you."

When Kurt shoves the ring into the pocket of his pants he just smiles lightly, inside he doubts that's true.

With that, Kurt walks out of their relationship. They are no longer husbands, and don't hold the ties the used to. Their interactions are now limited to "Hello" and "Goodbye" and information pertaining to their daughter Lily.

Blaine aches everyday, even more on the days he sees Kurt drive off with Lily, not giving him a second glance. The ring he keeps in his drawer is a reminder of the love they once shared, the lover he lost.

Two years later, Kurt finds a new man named Ethan. Although the divorce was years ago it _breaks_ Blaine's heart. Especially seeing Kurt smile so much when he's around, the way Blaine use to make him smile.

Blaine can't complain about Ethan and it bugs him because sometimes he selfishly wishes Ethan was horrible in comparison to him, but no...He's a gentleman, has a respectable job, is great with Lily, and _unlike himself_, Ethan has never cheated.

When Blaine's on his deathbed as early as fifty, his daughter Lily visits with her husband to say their goodbyes. He holds on for a few more days and on the Friday Kurt visits, he passes away that very night. Blaine let's go because he's finally able to prove to Kurt, that he did it. Just like he promised Kurt, he's loved him for the rest of his life, and he's never loved another man like him. He smiles before he takes his last breath.

Ethan is sympathetic the day Kurt breaks down when he receives the news. Kurt's distraught for nearly a month, but is able to get back on his feet to lead a relatively normal life.

Occasionally, when Ethan's out of town, Kurt stops by Blaine's grave to give him beautiful bouquets of flowers. He never says anything, but just sits in remembrance of his past life. A past in which he loved him.


End file.
